I've always dreamt of having fins in a world of blue...
the feeling of gliding through space, of being supported on all sides by water and salt... how I longed for it...
I spent most of the last year in tears - tears of frustration, grief, anger, and longing. I was ready to step out of the mud of loss and feeling lost.
I went to the ocean, the islands... hoping for healing. I wanted to break free of the ropes I found myself entangled in... the ropes that made movement and joy difficult.
My first time in the water, seeing the whales pass by... brought tears of awe. my vision had never been filled with such beauty.
My second time in the water, when a resting whale approached the surface for a sleepy breath, I wept tears of release and grace.
And this time, pictured above, when a playful calf chose to approach us... my eyes were filled with tears of joy.
The calf was so playful and curious, not at all cautious. It felt as if there was an emotional mirror between us... you see curiosity, joy, and freedom, and you reflect it back.
Every day in the ocean was magic and beauty - and that includes the days of wind, rain, swell, and low visibility. Every day, the ocean helped untangle the knots of doubt and grief stuck in my soul.
I intended to heal and connect with the ocean, the island, the people, but what I received was beyond what I could have ever wished for, even for a lifelong dream and a journey I spent a year preparing for...
and I think swimming with whales (or following your dream, the one that was made for who you are and where you'll go) requires serious intention and attention.
You should go into the ocean, into their space, with every good intention and the practice to be able to respect that good intention. Because when you do, you leave space for magic to happen and that magic will feel even more pure and immense when they're the ones to cast it - rather than you being the one to force it.